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THE SPANKING DIGEST: ISSUE 5

by LSF Publications


Collective Nouns

by Margaret Jane

Something was different about him that morning. His walking pace was quicker, his tie wasn't knotted to its usual perfection - he was definitely excited. He actually smiled when he greeted her.

"Good morning Miss Moore, no calls for the next fifteen minutes."

He practically slammed his office door and she wondered what exactly was going on.

Did she dare? She thought she did. Company policy allowed her to track his internet usage. He logged on immediately and to her amazement he looked up a website about birds - of the feathered variety! She dared even more by listening in to his first phone call - the dialling code was to a distant city.

"Arthur, have you seen it?"

An unknown male voice answered. "I certainly have, how soon will you be able to get away from work?"

"I can probably manage Friday off. That should give us three clear days; I just hope they haven't flown off by then. Look I'll make my travel arrangements and let you know on Thursday what I've managed to get sorted."

"Brilliant - hear from you then."

The two phones went down simultaneously.

Mr Fitzroy next booked himself into a very plush B&B miles away. Sophia found this very unusual as he would normally ask her to make these arrangements for him. He then rang the CEO and asked for Friday off. Sophie had never heard the CEO laugh before.

"Oh god, you're not off twitching again, Geoffrey?"

"Certainly am, Sir."

Sophia googled 'Twitching'. None of the results made sense until she came to the entries about bird watching.

Sophia thought fast; she'd wanted Mr Fitzroy since she started working as his PA. He barely seemed to notice her and Sophia wasn't used to being ignored. She went back to his initial website search and read quickly. Very rare blue ducks had been spotted on a bleak estuary somewhere in the north. She knew what she was going to do. Mr Fitzroy was nothing if not a creature of habit.

She had a hurried chat with her best friend in Accounts and they held a highly stage managed conversation during tea break when Mr Fitzroy was collecting his coffee and pastry.

"It's such a shame my dad is too ill to travel and I've no way of getting there without him. He'd love me to see the blue ducks; he's been hoping they'd get established again. He used to watch them when he was a boy."

"That's such a shame, Sophia," gushed her friend. "If only you knew someone else who was interested."

Mr Fitzroy paused by her desk.

"Are you talking about the blue ducks that were spotted yesterday, Sophia?"

Sophia looked convincingly taken aback.

"Why yes, Mr Fitzroy, how do you know about them?"

From there she reeled him in hook, line and sinker. He had no idea she'd played him. By the end of break she was booked into another room at the B&B and he was picking her up from home on Thursday evening and driving her to twitching country.

She took a crash course on twitching that night and felt she could hold her own in a general conversation - hopefully he'd never find out that about the only bird she could actually identify was a robin!

The drive north was pleasant and she felt she was finally getting somewhere with him. She was slightly disconcerted that he really only seemed to want to talk about birds. He hadn't complimented her or shown an interest in anything about her, but then she remembered he thought she was interested in birds too.

They only had time for a hasty supper at the B&B. Sophia tried to indicate subtly that she'd like to spend the night with him but he was oblivious. His parting words were, "I'll see you at six for breakfast."

Bloody hell, she thought, this had better be worth it.


At 6am when she appeared for breakfast there was another man already there. Mr Fitzroy, who had given her permission to call him Geoffrey on this trip, appeared two minutes after her and greeted the other man.

"Arthur, so good to see you, this is Sophia my PA - I didn't know she was a twitcher until earlier this week."

"Good morning, Sophia, good to have you on board." He appeared perfectly cordial.

Sophia let the two men chat away; it was obvious her crash course wasn't going to see her through an in depth conversation so she thought discretion was the better part of valour on this occasion. She observed Arthur closely and caught him watching her too. Geoffrey was handsome but Arthur was truly gorgeous. This could be interesting.

Sophia's plans began to unravel pretty soon after breakfast. She'd brought plenty of short skirts but not much of practical use. She had a pair of jeans and jumper but no walking shoes, only trainers. By the time they got to the observation hide her feet were soaked and she was squelching. Both men looked at her wryly.

Already both cold and wet, Sophia looked thoroughly put out when Arthur whispered, "Okay, total silence, we don't want to scare them off." Both men produced binoculars and looked expectantly at Sophia. She shook her head, shrugging her shoulders and settled down to look out one of the windows.

God this is boring, she thought - it wasn't even 7am. Sophia's wet feet made her uncomfortable and eventually she peeled her socks off and tried to let her feet dry.

She spoke loudly into the silence. "Do either of you have a hanky so I can get these dry?"

"Shut up, you silly girl," Arthur hissed at her.

She heard a squawk from outside and a couple of birds rose into the air and flew off.

"Was that them?" Arthur asked Geoffrey.

"No, no it wasn't," he replied, glancing crossly at Sophia.

Arthur turned to glare at her too. "If you make another sound I'll take the skin off your arse." Sophia's eyes widened and she opened her mouth to retort.

"I'd pay attention to him, Sophia," whispered Geoffrey. "He's more than capable of it."

Sophia scowled and stuck her tongue out at both of them, tossed her head and looked away. Inside, though, she was seething, who the hell did he think he was? Take the skin off her arse? She'd gouge his eyes out first. She was also annoyed with herself, she should never have got herself into this weekend - she was now stuck with these two bird watchers for three days.

Sophia was soon shivering with cold, but didn't dare ask if she could borrow an extra jumper from one of the men. They both had their backs to her anyway. Suddenly, a wasp flew in through the hide window and Sophia shrieked and fell backwards flapping her arms in alarm. This time birds all around took off in fright at the sudden noise and there seemed to be hundreds of them in the air. Both Arthur and Geoffrey howled in rage. Arthur advanced on her and gripped her by the upper arms.

"You stupid, stupid girl," he seethed. "Geoffrey, can you get to the next hide along, they look like they're settling there."

Geoffrey nodded grimly. "You're not a twitcher," he breathed into her face, "I don't know what your game is but quite frankly you deserve what you're about to get." And so saying he climbed out of the hide.

Sophia was still being held firmly but struggling against Arthur. "Geoffrey's right, you're no twitcher, but part of you is going to be twitching by the time I'm finished. We're going back to the B&B." Holding her wrist, he dragged her back to the car, barely letting her get her socks and trainers on.

As soon as they were away from the estuary area he began to scold her and she began to struggle even more fiercely. His grip was unyielding as he berated her, but she wasn't really taking in what he was saying; she was focused on what he was going to do to her. He pushed her into the car, buckled the seatbelt himself and she heard him use the child-proof locks to keep her in her place.

"Do you know what the collective noun is for a group of ducks?" he asked with barely controlled fury. She shook her head mutinously.

"A paddling! A paddling of ducks. Well I'm going to paddle your arse until you want to take flight and then I'm going to paddle you some more."

"If you as much as touch me I'll call the police."

"We'll see," he retorted. He revved the car engine and drove off.

"How's your father?" he asked suddenly.

"What?" she gulped.

"You heard, how's your father? That poor old man who was too ill to travel? Geoffrey was quite concerned about him."

Sophia shot him a look of pure loathing.

"There's not a damn thing wrong with him is there?" Arthur asked her. "You were just hoping to get into Geoffrey's pants. This just gets better and better. So many things to punish you for. Making you squirm might just make up for missing the blues."

"Oh fuck the sodding ducks, you boring git." Sophia couldn't help herself; she had a compulsion to keep riling him - possibly because when he used the word "punish" she had indeed squirmed in her seat, pressing her thighs very tightly together.

"Right, that's it." Arthur pulled the car over near a copse. Before she had time to react he hauled her out of the car and half dragged, half carried her into the thicket. "Shame you've got jeans on," she heard him murmur, then she found herself bent under his left arm, and with his left hand holding her waist she felt his right hand connect with her bottom. It was the shock that made her writhe, not the pain because he was quite right, through her jeans it didn't hurt that much. His hand smacked down about a dozen times in quick succession and then he paused.

"You're a despicable, foul-mouthed little trollop," he breathed in her ear, keeping her bent over. "Aren't you?"

Sophia, who couldn't quite believe what had just happened said nothing, she was so embarrassed she felt incapable of speech.

"Answer me!" came the cold command. She could tell him to fuck off but then wondered what he'd do in return. She was beginning to respond to being bent over and clutched the leg of his trousers firmly.

"Yes," at last came her halting reply.

"Yes, what?"

She hesitated, what did he expect? And then it came to her naturally, as if she'd known the appropriate response her whole life. "Yes, Sir."

"That's better." And again Sophia felt a torrent of blows on her behind. But it was more of an irritation than a punishment; she felt an unbidden stirring in her loins and suddenly wanted to feel a harder blow. Even so, when he stood her upright her breath was coming fast and she was flushed deep pink. This feeling intensified as he was looking at her with such dislike.

"Still going to call the police?"

She shook her head.

"I'd like to hear that please, Sophia."

She gritted her teeth in distress. "No, Sir."

"That's better. Let's get you back to the car and the B&B; I've rarely met a girl so desperately in need of a good hiding."

Sophia's blush deepened.

"What are you going to do to me?" she asked somewhat plaintively when the car pulled into the B&B car park.

"You'll find out soon enough - go to your room, I'll be along in ten minutes"

Sophia fairly trailed to her room. What did she do now, sit there waiting for him? The idea of fleeing the scene of her crime never occurred to her; she was curious yet terrified about what was going to be visited upon her person.



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