by Geraldine Roberts
The doctors had never been able to come up with any proper treatment for me and in the end, they mostly just tried to offer some reassurance that everything would finally work itself out and told me to be patient. It was not so easy though. I still used to see all my old school friends, but felt I was steadily falling behind and becoming more and more out of step with them. There were times when I just wanted to cry out loud with frustration. I often thought to myself, if I could only disappear for two or three years, maybe even go to prison, or much better, to a tropical island, just while I grew a bit taller. But I had always known that was an impossible dream. I couldn't then have imagined how things would turn out for me.
The doctors used to tell me that my physical development was out of step with my real age. It was something to do with my hormones apparently and should correct itself over time, but as things stood then, I was already nearly twenty and at college, but still with the body and face of a younger girl just entering her teens. Apparently it's a rare condition, but it's not unknown and affects about three girls in a thousand. There's even a special name for it - Eisendorf's Syndrome, whoever he or she may be.
So there I was, just five foot nothing and although I usually wore a 32A bra, which I have to admit I sometimes still padded out with tissues, I could really get away with just a crop top. Getting a proper drink in the pub or even going to the cinema for adult films was nearly impossible, unless I was dressed up and with a crowd of my older looking friends. When I went out, I nearly always wore heels, usually boots hidden under my jeans, as I look silly in stilettos. And then I had a way of piling up my hair which gave me an extra couple of inches; that and careful makeup.
But then it looked as if my wish was finally being granted. Not prison and unfortunately not a spell in paradise on a tropical desert island; for me it was back to school again. But if I hadn't decided to get a flat by myself last year, none of what I'm telling about, would ever have happened.
It all began one Tuesday, soon after the new term started. I had just popped out from my flat to go to the local corner shop to buy some milk for my breakfast cereal, when I bumped into Mrs Roberts. She was with her kids, a girl of about twelve or thirteen and a younger boy and she seemed a bit surprised to see me there.
"Hello. It's Sue isn't it? What are you doing in this part of town?"
I told her I had moved into a place just across the road and had now been there nearly two weeks since term began. She probably thought it was a bit unusual, as most second year students chose to share flats and houses closer to college. I could have done that myself, but to be honest, it was a relief sometimes to get away on my own and not have to worry what other people were thinking. Anyway I still went out to places with my friends in the evenings. It was just I found I liked a bit more private space, especially when I was getting ready for a night out on the town. So it suited me.
I knew Julia Roberts a bit from going to her sociology lectures over the last year and she had also sat and chatted with me on several afternoons in the college cafeteria over coffee. Mrs Roberts was originally from South Africa but had been to university here in the UK and had stayed on after she got married.
Anyway, she was a very friendly caring lady and would always listen patiently while I talked through my problems with her, but this time she seemed in a hurry and just asked me about my room, which I had to admit to her was pretty basic. The rental agent had called it a studio, but my Gran, who I lived with back at home, said it was just a grotty bedsit and said I should share with friends and get somewhere better. Gran didn't really understand that I needed some extra privacy and what a relief it was to be by myself sometimes, not having to worry about impressing other people.
Julia Roberts told me she also lived very near, in one of the new houses down the road and said I must come round for coffee sometime. By that time though, her kids were getting a bit restless and she had clearly needed to get them back home.
It was about a week later and I was waiting on my own at the bus stop near college when Mrs Roberts came by in her car and offered me a lift. We had to stop on the way and pick up Tom, her eight year old, from school; and then she suggested we go straight back to her house for a cup of tea. She had to give the kids drinks and something to eat as soon as they were back from school, so she said there would be tea and some cake going if I was interested. When we got there, Ann was already sitting in the kitchen with a glass of squash. She was at the local secondary and now walked back home with her friends after school.
"Hi, Ann. This is Sue, she's at the college. Remember we met her last week down at the shop."
After a perfunctory "Hi" both kids turned back to their snacks. So we let them get on with it and just chatted. She said I must call her Julia and explained that her husband was away working at present. John, who was English, had grown up not far away, but was now a civil engineer working on a massive new dam and power station project in Africa. Until recently, this had just involved regular visits, but since the summer he had been based there more or less permanently and would now stay for several years. He only got back for two weeks every two months. But Julia said the money was good and with two kids, was always useful.
On my side, Julia already knew about my retarded growth problems and I told her that I had seen the specialist again over the holidays, but that the message was the same as usual. I was told to be patient and that I would grow a bit more in time. I had been hearing that now for nearly ten years. My 'condition' may be well known, but I really did wish I could just disappear for a few years and come back at 5ft 3 and with a decent figure. Anyway, that's what they still predict for me by the time I'm twenty-five.
While we were chatting, Julia told me that twice a week she gave evening classes. Previously her husband had been able to look after the children and when he was sometimes away working, they had a lady from round the corner in to babysit. But she couldn't manage twice every week, so Julia had to find someone else and she asked me if I was interested. Of course the money would be handy and Julia said that if occasionally I was busy, she could probably still get the other lady, Emily, to come over. She admitted to me that her daughter, Ann, could sometimes be a bit of a handful as she didn't really agree that she still needed a babysitter, but anyway, we agreed to give it a go. Julia would give them both their tea before she left at seven and get Tom ready for bed. I would just have to settle him down an hour later. Ann could stay up until nine o'clock and should take care of herself. My job was just to make sure she did go up on time and then I could watch TV, study, or do whatever I liked, until Julia got back soon after ten o'clock. It seemed straightforward and when the kids were told, they seemed happy enough, Ann probably thought I couldn't be too bossy, as she could see I wasn't that much bigger than she was! So I agreed to come over just before seven the following Tuesday.
That day I still had some noodles left from my Monday's supper and ate them before going over. There wasn't much, but I hoped there would still be some cake on the go when I arrived. I took my text books with me to show just how hard working and conscientious I was. I was still wearing my boots and jeans from going to college, but hadn't bothered with my hair. Anyway I was in good time as I knocked on the door.
Julia was pleased to see me and we went straight into the kitchen. The cake was on the table and she suggested I make myself some coffee after she had gone out. Tom and Ann were in the front living room messing around with the TV on.
"One thing, Sue, we don't normally wear outside shoes around the house. You can either go around in your socks or there's some slippers here you could use. There's carpet everywhere, so you won't get your feet cold."
I sat down and pulled off my boots but now without the built-up heels, it left my jeans three-inches too long and I rolled them up showing the silly pink Minnie Mouse socks I had on that day.
"Sorry Sue, I didn't think. Are you sure that's OK? Don't trip yourself up. I could find you a skirt if you prefer My niece left lots of her old stuff here when she stayed with us last year."
I said I was fine, but Julia said that if I changed my mind, the old clothes were in the drawers in the spare room. She then had to rush out, but first told me, in front of the children, that I should report any naughtiness to her and she would deal with it tomorrow. Mrs Roberts was really nice and kind but didn't seem to put up with too much nonsense from the kids. She was a bit old fashioned like that, something to do with her South African background I guess. I thought she would probably get on well with my Gran who also believed a firm hand was sometimes needed.
Tom went up without too much fuss at eight and I turned his light out and went back downstairs. I strongly suspected Ann would prove more of a challenge and as this was my first time I wanted to be firm, but also not to upset her. She was sprawled out on the sofa.
"Have you finished your homework, Ann? Your mum asked me to remind you."
"Nearly, but I'm just having a bit of a rest."
I told her it had to be done by bedtime at nine... no later.
"And anyway, didn't Mum tell you to change into one of Penny's old skirts?"
I soon found Ann always wanted to have the last word, but I told her, her mum had said I could if I wanted, but that I was fine in my jeans.
"Mum doesn't like us wearing jeans all the time around the house. She changes herself and she nearly always makes me."
"Get on with your homework!"
"No, not until you change."
"If I change, will you get on and finish your homework." Well I didn't want a pointless battle with her on the first night.
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