by Louis Woodley
David and Ashley Lloyd were a couple in their mid-twenties. They'd been married for a couple of years when a job opportunity came along that David couldn't pass up. Unfortunately, it meant that they'd be moving to a new city and needed to go house hunting. That meant a compromise on the location. The position was in downtown, where Ashley preferred to live. She liked the upscale social life, but David wanted to raise a family in a small town and was willing to commute.
They agreed that the inner city real estate was out of their price range, and turned their hunt to the suburbs instead. Almost by accident David found a listing for a home in the village of Walsham. They had to look hard on their map function to even find it; perhaps it was a bit too far off the beaten path? But after a little research, David found that there was a commuter train station eight miles away in the Town of Clarksville.
Commuting by train would prevent wear on his car and save on parking fees. But there was little information about the village itself, and there was some verbiage in the listing saying that the purchaser must comply with 'community covenants'. That sounded like a hyperactive Homeowner's Association, something they were familiar with from their current rental house.
They decided to visit the listing. The location was everything David had hoped for: a big house for a cheap price, in a small village with neighbors who all seemed excited about new folks moving in. There was a single main street (unimaginatively called Main Street), with houses fanning out down side streets. Downtown was only about four blocks long, but appeared to have everything needed for small town living.
David's wife Ashley was tall and slim, a college volleyball player with a long blond ponytail. David hadn't been a star on his college football team, but thanks to his ability at long snapping, got on the field for punts and placekicks. They both remained in good shape, and traipsing around on foot wouldn't be a problem for them. They could easily walk the village end-to-end in under 15 minutes.
To David it seemed idyllic, although Ashley took some convincing before they put in a bid. It was accepted the same day, and weeks later they were moving to their new home.
As they drove into the village on Saturday afternoon, Ashley felt like an animal on display at the zoo. Everyone seemed to be openly staring at them and she was grateful to reach their driveway with the moving truck. But then the rest of the day people just kept popping by to say hello and appeared to be checking them out. Frankly, it was all getting a bit unnerving for her. And that unease didn't go away after the sun went down and the doorbell rang yet again. There was a crowd of men looking to come in for a few minutes if they didn't mind.
Once inside, Clay Butler introduced himself as being the part-time mayor of Walsham, as well as the local Magistrate. With him were Village Council members Kevin Stanton, Dan Johnson, Steven Humphrey, and Paul Faust. David and Ashley hadn't anticipated the local government dropping in on them.
"On behalf of the residents of Walsham, we welcome you to our community and hope you'll fit in well around here. But you need to understand that the rules are a little different around here, and you'll be expected to abide by them as part of your deed covenants."
David assured them that they were used to Homeowner's Associations and could comply on keeping their yard neat and making changes to their home. The local officials looked at one another before Mr. Stanton said that their rules could be considered fairly stringent as well as being relatively unique. Mr. Faust chimed in that not everyone was capable of complying; it was a matter of choice that those who lived here did so.
That sounded both cryptic and confusing. But Mr. Butler assured them that everything would be made clearer to them tomorrow evening. The men of the village would be getting together to introduce themselves to David and offer him guidance on how to become a successful Walsham husband. Meanwhile, the women would be getting together separately and they'd let Ashley know exactly what to expect from life in Walsham.
As Mr. Johnson was writing down their contact information, Mr. Humphrey asked about David's job. David explained that he'd just been hired as an Investment Broker in the city and would be commuting to work.
Then they asked about Ashley. She was an experienced office manager who'd be looking for a new position once they got everything settled in. Mr. Butler perked up his ears at that news. Was she highly organized? David bragged about her ability to sort through chaos. She had a stellar reputation for cleaning up messes and would have no trouble finding a position. Was she afraid of challenges? David again assured them that his wife had sorted out some true train wrecks in the past.
The mayor then threw out an unexpected offer. He'd been without an office manager for several months now, and things were in a state of disarray. She'd be doing the village a favor if, before taking a position elsewhere, she could first spend whatever amount of time was needed to sort things out in his office. Admittedly, the pay wouldn't be what she could likely command elsewhere, but it would both assist him and give her an opportunity to get to know some of the other village staff. And she could report first thing Monday morning...
Mr. Butler seemed to accept it as a given that Ashley would take him up on his offer. She hadn't planned to jump back into the job market until they were more settled, but it sounded like they needed help and she didn't want to get off on the wrong foot with the community by declining to assist them. Besides, she loved a challenge and it sounded like His Honor had let his records get all fouled up, so it would be an opportunity to ingratiate herself with the powers-that-be. And a little extra money never hurt, so she accepted the offer.
With that, the bureaucrats wished them well and said they would see them tomorrow night. After they left, David and Ashley admitted it seemed odd that the men and women would be segregated for whatever their big discussion was going to be, but wrote it off as just being a small town's idiosyncrasies. They wondered what exactly the deed restrictions were, but had no idea what they'd just walked into.
They spent Sunday setting up house, again dealing with a steady stream of visitors stopping to say hello. Honestly, their overly friendly nature got bit annoying. In their old neighborhood everyone was nodding acquaintances at best.
One of the visitors introduced herself as Emily Butler, the mayor's wife, who seemed to be sizing her up as her husband's new employee. She said she would be by at 7pm to take Ashley to the women's meeting. Her husband would escort David to their get-together. Ashley asked why there would be separate meetings. Emily said that she hated to be cryptic but it would all make sense later.
David was equally baffled why there seemed to be such a cloak-and-dagger routine about yard maintenance. But when Clay and Emily arrived on their doorstep, Clay escorted David off towards the village administrative building, while Emily and Ashley went in the opposite direction to the church hall.
David found dozens of men waiting to greet him. Some he'd met over the weekend, but a lot of them were new faces. Melissa Lester was the only woman in attendance with her husband, Rich. But they seemed universally happy for a new face in the village.
The conversation started with the usual blather that new residents hear from neighbors everywhere. This was a respectable community, so keep things neat, no loud parties, etc. But it wasn't until Mr. Butler explained their most important covenant that he realized it wasn't him they were so thrilled about seeing, it was Ashley. And it wasn't her face that they were so intrigued about; what they were far more interested in seeing (and getting their hands on) was a yard lower and behind her!
"One thing that makes us unique is our commitment to old fashioned values. Around here it is accepted that the man is the head of the household. You will be expected to be an active participant as a husband in this community and there will be expectations for your wife as well. They're being explained to her as we speak. Are you familiar with the concept of domestic discipline?"
David's mind was reeling; did they mean...
"You know the saying about it takes a village to raise a kid, right? So there's nothing wrong with a good butt roasting to get a kid to behave; that's a father's responsibility to keep his kids straight. But just because girls grow up doesn't mean that they sometimes need correcting when they make mistakes."
Someone else chipped in with, "You could say it takes the village to keep our wives and young ladies straight. So if your wife is disrespectful or does something dumb, she deserves to have her pants pulled down and take a trip across your lap! A good hard spanking will get the message across."
"Yes," said Mr. Butler, "and if you don't happen to be around at the time, one of us will take care of the job for you. And the same goes for us; if you catch one of our wives showing her ass then she knows to listen to you when you tell her to drop her drawers and get ready for a whipping. And she'd better not fight you while you're tanning her hide!"
David listened, incredulous as the conversation continued.
"And the only real spanking is a bare bottomed one, so don't let them keep their undies on."
"There's no modesty here; they aren't showing off anything that half of us haven't already seen. Once they turn 18 their bottoms are fair game for any man who catches them acting out. Besides, you need to see how red their ass is getting, since they all heat up differently. You don't want to overdo it, but you don't want her getting off easy because you didn't put enough effort into it."
"Don't worry about privacy either; if she shows her ass in public she knows she's going to be showing off her ass in public."
"That's why there are benches downtown. Just march her over to one, make yourself comfortable and then make her butt uncomfortable."
"Seeing somebody getting their fanny fried reminds both kids and wives of what will happen to them if they misbehave, so it's really a way to encourage good behavior around here."
"And it doesn't have to just be your hand either. Some stripes from your belt work wonders."
"And be sure to invest in a good hairbrush for her. Nice solid wooden back; don't buy that plastic crap. Just ask at Long's store; they know what you need it for. They'll even let you do comparison shopping to find just the right one!"
"And don't fall for the tears routine either. 'Oh boo hoo, it hurts so much, please stop' - if she deserves a red butt, then you give her a red butt; don't let the waterworks stop you."
"You've got my blessing to roast my Kathleen's rump until there's steam rising from it!"
Several other men expressed similar permissions for David.
Wait... what? Tanning her hide? Naked butt? David's head was spinning; what were they saying? Not only would he be expected to spank his wife, but any other man in town would turn Ashley over his lap if they decided she'd done something wrong?
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