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OVER HIS NANNY'S KNEE

by Lewis Stone


1. Introduction

As a vehicle came into the driveway and a car door slammed shut, Mary Lowell sighed with relief as her son Rick was now home safe. Going to bed had been a waste of time as there was no chance in hell of sleeping until he came home.

If changing the past was possible, Rick may not have been out until two that morning, just as he had been late home three or four nights of every week for over a year now. Likely far from sober, the idea of him driving home drunk always scared her. As he had just turned twenty-years old, Mary felt she had little or no control over him, even though he lived at home and she paid all the bills. Her authority had started fading the minute he turned into a rebellious teenager at fourteen.

She recalled that earlier time in her life. As a single parent she'd had no choice but to accept a junior executive position with the company she'd worked with for over a decade, though it meant leaving Rick alone for much longer during the week and sometimes all day on weekends. Her work provided financial security, but now she wondered what cost the material gain came with.

She'd been able to purchase items that were previously outside the scope of her budget. Her son had nicer clothes and other attractive possessions, but with each passing year of her busy work life, Rick's behaviour went from bad to worse. He squeaked through grade twelve with minimum marks and now in business courses at a local college, he barely kept his grades high enough to avoid getting booted out.

Mary thought the decision to enrol him was perhaps another mistake. Not only did he not study, his association with a rowdy crowd on the campus didn't help either at school or home. Those associates took full advantage of Rick's access to a large allowance, spending most of it on beer and junk food. They encouraged him to be more independent from his mother, suggesting he move out of his home, and of course bring his money with him. Rick loved being popular on campus and didn't give much thought to the idea his popularity might be because of his money.

Mary tried many times to talk to him, she begged and demanded he change his ways, but realized she might as well be talking to a stone wall. Any conversation about changing his ways would result in him getting angry and leaving the house, coming back two or three days later raging drunk, and dead broke.

The next day after a fitful sleep, Mary sat down to consider her latest situation. Due to her successes, the company had offered her a senior executive assignment. The position came with a lot more money and new challenges, but there was a drawback. The job was in a foreign country several thousand miles away. Since Rick had turned legal age; the company would not agree to his accompanying her. They had concerns he would be in trouble trying to deal with a culture much stricter about alcohol consumption and sexual activity outside of marriage.

Mary spent days weighing the pros and cons of the new job, the firm telling her to take her time. On the last day to make a decision, she told the CEO she would accept. Her only condition would be to leave in two months, allowing her to make suitable arrangements at home. The company arranged her work down to thirty-two hours a week to assist her in making the change. She was happy with the four-day workweek, and pleased by the response to an email inquiry, which meant she just needed the final details of a personal matter to be worked out with a lawyer.

Mary told Rick of her acceptance of the job in another country and the fact he would be staying home and attending school. He asked why he couldn't come, but his real thoughts were about the opportunity for more liberty and how impressed his friends would be when he had a house all on his own.

Rick tried to keep quiet the fact he was happy about his mother leaving, but it wasn't easy to do. He told everyone he knew about his soon to be freedom, and of course some of his friends pushed him to let them know when his mother was gone. Some of them planned to move in shortly after he had the house to himself.

Three weeks after hearing his mom had accepted the new position, Rick came home early from college one day. It happened to be one of the few times during the week he was actually sober. His mother could be heard speaking to someone in the living room. Entering the room, he said, "Hi Mother. Home early today and I thought I heard you talking to someone."

Mary hadn't been expecting him, but perhaps it was for the best. "Hello Rick. I'd like you to meet Miss Roberts. Colleen was my nanny up to when I turned thirteen."

Colleen stood and extended her hand. "Hello Rick, glad to meet you. I need to ask, is your name Rick or Richard?"

He grimaced as he shook her hand. "Rick, Richard, who cares. I've gone by Rick since I turned fourteen. Why would you ask?"

Colleen looked at him, the frown on her face obvious. "I'm the type who likes everything to be just right, including names, places and things. Every person has a name, every place a designation, and every thing a place. Your mother will tell you I'm fussy about things, especially addressing people by their proper names."

Mary smiled. "Yes, I remember it well. Everyone and everything needed to be correct and in its place. Hated it at the time, but that training is likely the reason I enjoy the employment I do today. All thanks to Miss Roberts of course."

Rick made a face. "Everyone's different I suppose. What works for one person doesn't for another. So Colleen, what do you do for work now?"

Colleen walked toward him. "Before answering, Rick or Richard whoever you are, why do you address me by my first name when your mother introduced me as Miss Roberts? Didn't your mother teach you to respect your elders?"

Rick stepped back, recognizing a woman who exerted power with her words. "Everyone calls people by their first names. I call my professors at college by their first names."

She took another step closer to him. "I'm not interested in what everyone else does. I care about the people around me, and those people who are my friends call me Colleen. Acquaintances address me as Miss Roberts. How do you think you should address me?"

Not feeling comfortable, Rick decided to ignore the question. "Nice meeting you. Listen Mom, I'm getting together with some of the guys, so don't wait up for me. Bye." He turned to leave the room.

Colleen reached out to grasp Rick's ear before he was half way through his turn. "Hold your horses, Rick. I asked a question, I expect an answer."

Rick turned back, anger flashing in his eyes. Yanking her hand down, his words sounded like a growl. "Take your ugly paws off me! Don't ever touch me again, Miss Bitch!"

No longer having a grip on his ear, she slapped his face with her open palm. "Don't you dare talk to me that way ever again! I know how to deal with your type, and I guarantee you won't like it!"

Rick rubbed his cheek as he took several steps back. "Best go before doing something I regret. Goodbye Mom. Bye, lady. Don't touch me or you could get hurt." While retreating toward the door, he kept an eye on Colleen the entire time.

With his mother now only two weeks away from leaving, Rick agreed to meet her at lunch on Sunday. He thought she needed to talk about money and deal with work on the house. All stuff that bored him to death, except money, that part always interested him. He thought it rude of his mother to tell him to make sure he was sober, but with her leaving, he didn't care. He showed up early, hoping to be out with his friends within the hour.

"Good lunch, Mom. What's this talk about? I'm twenty-years old and can look after myself and the house, no problem. Just tell me where the money is and leave a list of people who can fix any problems with the house. Things will be fine. I promise the house will still be standing in a year." He laughed after his last comment, thinking it funny.

Mary pulled papers out of her purse. She set her mind to treat him like one of the company employees.

"Things are never simple, Rick. I want to say you are very important to me, and I want the best for you. If anything ever happened, the house can be replaced, you cannot. Not that I don't love this place. This has been our home for a long time and I worked hard getting it fixed up. I've taken some steps I deem necessary to protect you and the house. Everything is in this document. Would you like to read it, or should I summarize it for you?"

"Mother, I hate small details. Tell me the main points and move on with things."

Mary sighed, she had been hoping for more of a grown up son, but her hopes were dashed as he went on. "Rick, life is often run by small details, so I suggest you start paying attention to them. This is a certified copy; the original is at my lawyer's office. No one can make changes without my permission. Now, are you sure you don't want to read it?"

Seeing him shrug once again, Mary continued. "All right. The first point is I used the same bank we are with now. Your account is there, which will be filled on the fifteenth and twenty-eighth of every month. The bank will access my other accounts to pay the taxes, utilities, your books and tuition along with other necessary payments that may arise. I increased your allowance by two hundred a month. My living expenses are covered by the company. With my salary there's no need to worry about money. That's the banking part in a nutshell."

He was in shock; Rick expected a lot more than two-hundred dollars. "Two hundred extra?! Mom, I need a lot more if I'm by myself. Better add another thousand or better still fifteen hundred to be safe."

His mom shook her head. "Sorry Rick, that's the limit. Now, what you said about living here by yourself. I'm afraid that's not true. I've employed a lady to live in and help out. She will access an account to purchase groceries and other materials."

He thought things might be looking up. If his mom hired an older maid, he would soon fire her and hire some great looking chick to clean the house and warm his bed.

"So, you hired a live-in maid?"

"No Rick, not a maid. I think it best you continue with your chores around the house, although for the past few months you haven't done them. This lady will do her share of the housework, but will not be a servant to order around. In fact, this document allows her to give orders instead of the other way around."

Rick stood and shouted at his mother. "I don't want no strange bag of a woman in my house giving orders. Hope you didn't hire anyone yet because she won't be in the house after you're gone Mom, that's a fact."

It was Mary's turn to shrug.



© Lewis Stone
Not to be reposted, reproduced or distributed, in part or whole.