by Frank Martinet
Even at 38 Dany still thought of herself as young and attractive, until she arrived on campus and saw all the hot 18-year-olds in skimpy shorts and tight jeans.
What the hell am I doing here? she asked herself, suddenly feeling her age. Her own daughter was almost as old as her fellow students.
"Are you the new English teacher?"
Dany turned and discovered an extremely young-looking man peering at her. His eyes were wide with excitement and his grin was sassy, his eyebrows raised in an expectant leer. Subtle, he was not, but clearly he didn't find her repulsive, which made her feel better.
"Actually, I'm a student," she said boldly. "I'm looking for Hayden Hall. Do you know where that is?"
"No shit?" said the boy, clearly amazed that such an elderly woman could get out of bed, let alone attend college. "Wow. Uh, Hayden's the engineering college. You don't want that."
"I don't?" It was Dany's turn to raise her eyebrows suggestively.
"Uh, well, I mean, you're a girl. I mean, a woman. You-"
"I have a class with Professor Gibson starting in fifteen minutes. Do you mind pointing me in the right direction? I don't want to be late on my first day."
"Uh, sure." The boy pointed, and Dany set off, pleased with the feel of the kid's eyes on her ass.
She wondered how long he'd stare after her. It made her self-conscious, for her butt was broad and not compact like so many of the tight little tushes she saw around her. But then she was fully grown, had pushed out a 6-pound baby, and had some Hispanic heritage that gave her a voluptuous figure men adored.
Alfonso had certainly admired her backside. He always said it was her best feature. Dany felt a pang in her chest that she hated. How could she still have feelings for him after everything he'd done? It had been nearly a year since the divorce and still she hurt. She wanted desperately to move on. Not quite into dating - she was done with men for a while - but at least to not feel such ridiculous longing for a man who was far removed from the one she'd married 18 years earlier.
Hayden Hall was a huge rectangular building shaded by giant oaks. Dany headed up the path and marched up the cement steps, her heart twitching nervously. For a split second she was compelled to turn around and forget the whole thing, but pushed on, knowing that she needed this. She didn't quite know why, for it wasn't like she was going to start an engineering career at her age, but it was just something she felt she had to do.
She'd quit college halfway through her degree to marry Alfonso, what she now thought of as a huge mistake, so perhaps this was a way to turn back the clock and rectify matters. Whatever the reason, she was going to graduate and accomplish something. Maybe she just wanted to prove to herself that she could do this without a man.
Just as she thought this she found her classroom and realized it contained 90% men. She saw only two girls out of perhaps 30 men in the room. Almost all of them turned to look at her as she entered, most with puzzled or amused expressions as they tried to figure out what she was doing there. She knew it was the right room - she'd triple-checked her schedule.
She found a seat toward the back and made a point of hauling out her thick textbook and placing it on the desk in front of her so that everyone could see she was a student and not a teacher. She settled in and waited, wondering what the professor would be like, and trying to ignore the whispers and stares of her classmates.
Fortunately, she didn't have to wait long. After just a few minutes a tall, lanky gentleman entered. He was in his forties, with dark hair liberally sprinkled with gray. He was dressed in a fine dark suit with a white shirt and a gray tie. His jacket was fully buttoned despite the warm fall weather. His face was narrow, handsome in a stern manner, his beard full and surrounding his mouth, though it was neatly trimmed and nothing like a caveman look. Dany thought he looked distinguished, just like a professor should.
Professor Jacob Gibson gazed around the room as he straightened his materials on his podium. He checked the clock and compared it to his watch, frowned, and crossed over to the door to shut it firmly.
"My name is Professor Gibson and this is Linear Algebra and Differential Equations. If you're not supposed to be here, please leave. Be aware that I do not tolerate tardiness. If you're not here on time, you're not here, as far as I am concerned. Unlike the courses of some of my colleagues, attendance to my classes are mandatory. If you are not here you will receive a zero for the day and attendance is ten percent of your grade.
"I do not grade on a curve, there are no makeup tests, and I don't offer extra credit, so don't even ask. This is a tough course. I won't lie to you about that. A third of you will fail and be repeating this next semester. That's not my problem. For an engineering degree, understanding basic algebra and differential equations is critical. I take this course seriously and so should you. If you don't like anything I'm saying, you might as well leave right now."
There was a long, nervous pause. Heads were turning as students looked at each other. Finally one young man, his face reddening, got up and scrambled away. He rushed to the door and departed, clearly intimidated by the teacher's foreboding lecture. Dany wondered if she should follow him. But she needed this course. She stayed put.
"Very well. If everyone..." Professor Gibson paused. Dany looked up, wondering why he'd stopped speaking, and discovered the man's dark eyes were boring into hers.
"Excuse me, Miss. But aren't you in the wrong classroom?"
"No sir," said Dany, her heart beating faster and her face growing slightly warm. She nervously held up her textbook to show she knew what class she'd signed up for.
"How old are you?"
Dany flushed. "That's none of your business," she mumbled defensively.
"It is my business if you're just here to waste my time. Are you auditing? I don't permit that."
"No, I'm a real student." Dany took a deep breath. "Not that it's any of your business, but I dropped out of college a, uh, number of years ago and now I'm back. I want to finish my engineering degree."
"Really." Sarcasm dripped from the man's chin. "You want to become an engineer?"
Dany bristled. Suddenly she didn't like this man, regardless of how good-looking he was. She straightened her shoulders. "Yes. I'm majoring in Multidisciplinary Engineering, if you must know."
"What is your name?"
"Dany Palmira."
The man frowned. "I approved you, but I didn't realize you were--"
"What, old?" snarled Dany. "A woman? That's none of your concern, Mr. Gibson. I have every right to take this course, just as much as any man!"
"I was going to say I didn't realize you'd been out of school for so long, Miss Palmira. How long has it been?"
"It's Mrs. Palmira, and I don't see what difference it makes how long I-"
"It makes a tremendous difference, Mrs. Palmira," interrupted the professor. "Engineering is not a static profession. I'm not even sure the courses you took 20 years ago even qualify for the prerequisites. Plus, if you haven't studied the material in 20 years, I doubt you're ready for a class such as this."
"It's only been 18 years, and I have been brushing up. I still had my old textbooks and I went back through them, and I think I'm ready."
Professor Gibson looked skeptical, but shrugged. "Very well, Mrs. Palmira. But don't expect preferential treatment from me. I will demand the same from you as I demand of all my students."
Dany slouched in her seat as the man turned away from her. He flipped on a projector and adjusted his laptop to show a slide of the course syllabus. As he began going through the material, she began to sweat. Her boast of having caught up wasn't entirely true. She had found the textbooks, but that was it. She'd intended to study them, but had run out of time. Now she realized that Professor Gibson was speaking a foreign language. She was woefully behind.
Maybe I should have started with something basic like Analytic Geometry or Calculus, she thought. It seemed a step back, since she'd taken those first-year courses years ago, but how much of them did she actually remember? The more Professor Gibson talked, the more she realized she was behind.
But she couldn't back out now, not after bragging that she could handle his class. She would show the bastard. She would ace his class and serve him up some humble pie!
She seethed as she tried to take notes. After years of living as an adult, it was a shock to be treated like a child. She didn't like it, and decided that after class she'd have some words with Professor Gibson. It wasn't fair for him to single her out just because she was a little older.
As the two-hour class finally ground to a halt, Dany had almost forgotten her plan. She was busy trying to figure out how she was going to get all her homework done in addition to her other classes and trying to catch up with her basic algebra. As she gathered her notes and textbook, students around her rapidly departing, she was startled when Professor Gibson called her name.
"Mrs. Palmira. Would you remain behind for a moment?"
Dany waited until almost everyone had left and slowly made her way down to the floor where the professor was erasing his whiteboard. By the time she got to him, they were alone, which was a relief. She felt tension in her chest and shoulders, positive he had plans to berate her.
Up close, she was troubled by how tall he was and how he looked even better than she'd thought. Confusion flooded her. She wanted to hate him, but also she wanted to like him.
"You wanted to see me, Professor Gibson?"
"Yes. I noticed you were handwriting your notes. Don't you have a laptop?"
"Is that a requirement?"
"No, but it's helpful. I go at a rapid pace and I'm not sure you can keep up handwriting everything. Plus, there's supplemental material that's available online. You can look at it later, of course, but sometimes referring to such information during the class is helpful."
"I... I'll think about it," said Dany. She felt slightly embarrassed that it hadn't even occurred to her to bring a laptop. When she was in college everything was done by hand. Times had changed.
The man studied her somberly. "What exactly are you planning on doing with your degree, Mrs. Palmira?"
"You think I'm too old to start a career in engineering?"
"Did I say that?" Professor Gibson frowned. "You certainly like putting your words into other people's mouths."
"I didn't mean-" Dany began. Then she stopped, flustered. "Honestly, I don't know what I'm going to do with my degree. Maybe nothing. I know I'm old for a new career, especially in a field like engineering, but I still want this. Isn't that enough?"
"You tell me. Just how badly do you want this? Because it's not going to be easy."
Dany responded defensively before she considered her situation. "I can do it," she said confidently, almost immediately realizing that she should have told him the opposite and asked for help.
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